Tuesday, August 31, 2010

burger, fried potato


Bunless burger. Ground top round. Homemade mayonnaise. Special mayonnaise made with extra stone-ground mustard, real rustic like, and honey too, mountain wild flower honey where the bees have to work extra hard because those mountain flowers are more varied and more spread out than regular orchard flowers, and they're smaller than regular flowers so they produce less pollen. Mmmmm, bee vomit and bee sweat. Probably bee tears too. They're crying about their own awareness of their abject slavery and their deplorable living conditions, about the futility of working steadily for the collective just to have it all scooped away by some grotesquely costumed human apiarist. But to persist for a season until finally their torn tattered wings can no longer lift and they drop like a stone to the ground and buzz there helplessly until the sun dries them out or a bird comes along and devours them with  a swift peck and a gulp. 

Quit complaining and get my honey, Bitches.

I ground up a decent size top round steak using this thing ↓. Another animal gave its all for my burgers, and other peoples' steaks and roasts. Another example of animal exploitation. Oddly, I do not find grinding meat to be macabre at all. It's actually fun.


If you make a little dimple in your burger then it won't compress so badly as it cooks, and if you add a little water it will 1) hasten cooking by steam, and 2) help keep the burger moist. Wine or beer, any alcohol, while moisteners are also fantastic distributors of flavor. So what more excuse reason do you need to pop open a beer  while you're grinding your roasts?

Potato cooked in the microwave for five minutes. Cut while still hot. Fried in olive oil / butter seasoned with fresh Rosemary for a rustic outdoorsy pine-tree touch. The hamburger was cooked in that same flavored oil since it has so little fat of its own. 



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